My wife and I both run businesses.
Which means we’re both busy, both constantly managing 10 open browser tabs in our brains, and if we’re being honest, both secretly convinced we’re carrying slightly more of the load than the other.
We also have 2 kids (now 6 and 9), so shit can get real heavy, real quick.
It’s not toxic. It’s just… modern marriage.
And most of the time, we’re good. Like, really good.
We know how to function. We know how to move.
We back each other.
But under the surface, little things can pile up.
More like those small, annoying things that come up when multiple humans live in one space.
Like “someone” didn’t do the dishes… ALL WEEK.
Or someone “forgot” to bring back the coffee the other person asked for.
Or “someone” hasn’t said “I love you” in, like, forever (that’s me actually).
None of these things are deal-breakers by themselves.
But left to build? They cost us clarity, connection, and the energy we both need to do our best work and live well together.
So, we started doing something simple.
And it stuck.
We call it the Sunday Check-In – (we do it on Sunday morning because it’s the only uninterrupted time we can get while the kids are glued to the cartoons).
And we’ve done it almost every week since.
Here’s how it works:
We sit down. No tech. Coffee helps. And we take turns giving ourselves a score (out of 10) for four things:
- Mojo – how much momentum or energy we felt this week
- Happiness – not deep philosophy, just… how happy did I feel
- Health – physical
- Connection – how close or connected did I feel by the other person
We go through our scores one by one. No debate. No fixing. Just listening.
Then 1 request (if needed):
“Here’s one thing where I need more support at the moment…”
And one final statement:
“This week, I really appreciated you… (in this way)”
That’s it. Whole thing takes ten minutes, max (unless you haven’t done it for a while or you’re just starting out – then you should expect to be unloaded on!)
No whiteboards. No journaling. Just a quick emotional sweep of the house.
So what’s changed since we’ve done this?
Not everything. But a lot.
We fight less.
We recover faster when we’re feeling off.
We know where the other person is at on the regular, which stops so much wasted energy guessing, assuming, or quietly resenting.
It’s weird how something so small makes such a big difference.
But it’s like clearing the cache.
It resets the space between us, and I can’t tell you how important that is if you’re trying to stay at a high-energy level all week.
We show up lighter. We work better. And we back each other faster.
I’m not saying this is the magic bullet.
I’m just saying it helped us.
We’re still the same people. Still running full-speed businesses. Still trying to figure out how to be good partners and good humans at the same time.
But now we have this anchor point in the week where we stop and check in, and it helps prevent blowups from happening before they get the chance.
So if you’re in the thick of building something – a business, a family, a life together – and you feel like the wheels aren’t coming off, but the tyres are wobbling a bit…
Try it.
Ten minutes.
Four scores.
One ask.
One thank you.
See how it feels.
Worst case, you have a nice coffee and feel slightly awkward.
Best case? You get your bandwidth back. You reconnect.
And you remember why you got into this partnership, in business and in life, in the first place.